Labor Day weekend was spent in the company of great friends at Kymer Campgrounds in New Jersey. No! I didn’t sleep in a tent, nor did I start a fire (Those “real” camping experiences were left to Carlos and Benny). My Camping adventure starting when we unloaded the car and put all our food and belongings in a the rented trailer. Yes, a trailer. Equipped with bathroom, 3 full size beds, kitchen, and television. Hence, the reason its called luxury camping. There was a lot of booze, food and laughs. The days were spent eating, swimming and playing volleyball while the nights were filled with even more food, Karoke and loads of liquor. We made new friends (i.e. Volleyball girl a.k.a Maddy) and got to know each other a whole lot more.  All in all it was a great weekend but…

In the midst of all the food and laughs, I secretly felt a little lost.

It might have been the loss of connection to the world (I had no phone service and no WiFi), The peaceful mornings fulled with birds chirping, or silence of the night that would force my mind to wander and make me fight my own demons. When I was surrrounded by people I was fine, feeling content and happy. At night while everyone else slept. I would wake and just stair at the ceiling, praying that soon I would grow tiresome once again and sleep. When sleep didn’t come quick enough I was forced to come face to face with myself…parts of myself I’ve hidden for so long, afraid of rejection and loss.

Wishing of “once upon a time”….AA